Capt SpaceBat

This evening, I popped out to the local shop to top up supplies of milk and tobacco.  This, in itself, was nothing especial; but for the fact that I was using my occasional walking stick as my sciatica and lumbago had been playing up for the past few days - two boxes of painkillers and a lot of bravery later, things were just about manageable, albeit less than comfortable.

On crossing the road and turning the corner, I all but bumped into a fox that was going about his evening business.  The fox froze for a second and then ran down the pavement then across the road at the crossing.  Very commendable road safety, I thought, especially given the level of traffic.  The fox then ran across a side road directly into the path of an oncoming car.  I was still stock still, thinking that too many things were moving at the same time and thus causing confusion and panic.  Fortunately, the fox turned back and made it safely to the pavement. I continued towards the shop until I spotted the fox on the way across the crossing again - I stopped, fearing for the worst; the fox just avoided becoming a red fur trim once again before finding temporary refuge in a garden.

I’m not sure who was the more worried: me or the fox, although it was obviously the fox with most to lose. in dealing with my panic, I realised that any action by me would only make the situation worse, or at least no better.  Fortunately, we both emerged unscathed from the encounter.

Usually, doing nothing is my preferred mode, kicking myself later for my sins of omission - having fulfulled most of the ones of commission quite some years ago - but this time it was the correct course of action.

Earlier today, I’d had a minor “episode” - ticking a number of the “PRAISE” boxes: Paranoid and Angry especially.  Again, I was able to deal with it by removing the perceived source of the trouble after a very short outburst and calming down, focussing on what had really been behind my feelings and inability to deal with them.  As a result, my outlook has improved and am now able to deal far better with the cause of my frustrations.

Knowing when to act and when to remain still seems to be the key to this and many other situations.  Isn’t there a prayer about something along those lines?

Speaking of which, the resolutions are coming along well, but not necessarily as quickly as I would have liked; I must get used to that or at last remember when to accept it due to external pressures or fight my internal pressures - in any case adapting to meet what comes, yet still make progress.